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The first of many...

It started with a feather…

My spiritual journey has not been an easy one but it has been an amazing one as well. What I have come to realise is that we are all so different, unique and special. Whilst on my journey, obstacles get thrown my way and they knock you down a few steps, but what defines you is how you get back up.

I have my own insecurities and my own issues; the mystery of life is that whatever gets thrown at you helps you face these demons and grow as a person. One lesson I am learning right now is that it is ok to not be ok. I put so much pressure on myself to be my best authentic self when in actual fact I am just like everyone else…Human. I make mistakes, I have feelings, I need to cry, I need to let my thoughts out. I started to look for signs from the universe and it all started with the feathers, and they still appear whenever I need them. Then came the robins, then came the numbers, then came the songs on the radio, the people in the street, the movies on the TV. The signs never end, and I am so grateful they are sent to me, they make you stop and realise we aren’t alone and that we are here for a purpose.

We have a perfect vision of how we want to be, look, sound and feel but in matter of fact it never works out like that. We still nag our partners, we still annoy our siblings, we still say things we don’t mean, we still get angry instead of remaining calm, we still put things off until tomorrow, we still doubt ourselves, we still haven’t finished that book. We aren’t perfect and we will never be perfect, so why waste time on trying to perfect yourself.

We miss out on the times where we can be messing up but then the best part is the makeup. Look around your beautiful life, you have so many wonderful things to appreciate and be thankful for. Let go of trying to make everything a fairy tale, one thing I am working on right now (me being a Disney fanatic). Life is one big rollercoaster; the lows teach us the lessons and the highs help us to be thankful.

The part of me that had to leave….

11th September 2017 – the day I lost my Nan, the day I lost a part of me We all must go through some sort of loss in our lives, whether it be a break up, money, a house, a friendship, a loved one or even yourself at some point. Each loss is equally as hard for each person. My loss made me stronger, my loss made our family closer, my loss pushed me in the direction of hope, my loss made me a better person. Losing someone I will admit is the hardest, scariest, traumatic time I’ve ever had to deal with. I bottled a lot of my feelings in because I wanted to be everyone else’s rock and shoulder to cry on. Still to this day I kept those feelings hidden, but this is why I am writing my first ever blog today to slowly guide those bottled feelings out and into the universe.

Releasing anger, upset, heartache, judgement, frustration is good for us, it helps us to heal, it helps us to forgive. I never gave up. She is with me always, I just need to believe it to see it.

So, my wish for each and everyone of you is to have hope. Hope that life does get better, hope that the sun does shine again, hope that life is a mystery, hope that you are so special.

My love and light

Phillippa x

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